i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
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