somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
