Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
