so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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