what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize