im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
