You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
