there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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