I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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