Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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