Can i not drive my cunt home
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
