oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
