great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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