She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
