I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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