Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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