I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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