I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
