So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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