Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
operation have a gay friend backfired
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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