I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
