morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
