And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize