so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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