You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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