the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
We need to rekindle our bromance
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
