I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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