You're so nebulous sometimes
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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