Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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