we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
My vagina just clenched in fear
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
