i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
