turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
