good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Help. Why am I so naked?
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