so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
