that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
