if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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