So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
