hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Randomize
