The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize