The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
