Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
