i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
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