I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
The power of my boobs compel you
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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