If that was your dad, he is hot
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
