i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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