how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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