It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
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You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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