Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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