I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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