I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
